Kids will believe anything!
Young kid of bout 7 with her parents standing behind me in the check-in queue...
Kid: "is Australia far away?"
Mother: "it's really far, do you know how many miles it isaway?...77,000 Kilometres!"
Overheard by sw, In the check-in queue for Dublin bound flight in the airport in Paris
Posted on Monday, 05th September 2005
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Rating score (100) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
You can't buy class...
After a bit of a session in Bia Bar with the lads on Saturday night a few weeks ago, we made our way up to the Green to get a hot dog that you would only consider eating after a skin full of beer....
My brother was in the queue a few people ahead of trying to order a heap of hot dogs for himself. Next thing a couple of fairly decent looking birds roll up beside me (possible beer goggles on). I turned to them and said "Howaya girls, any craic?" to which the better looking of the two replies in your typical skang accent "Yeah, one right up the middle of me arse!"
Everyone falls around laughing, I think.. "You, marry me right now!"
Overheard by Carl, St. Stephens Green
Posted on Saturday, 10th May 2008
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Rating score (131) | Comments (15) | Email to a friend |
Overheard incorrectly in Dublin
It was my first week working in a supermarket during the school holidays and I was busy packing shelves. An old lady asked me for the jacks, so I brought her to the ladies and said I'd wait outside. She looked puzzled and asked me why I brought her there. I said it's because you asked for the bathroom....
She said, I'm looking for AJAX
I still cringe everytime I think of this
Overheard by Breda, Supervalu, Killester
Posted on Friday, 07th March 2008
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Rating score (773) | Comments (11) | Email to a friend |
Crash Landing
Written on the emergency plastic card in the back sleeve of chair on aer lingus plane (the part where the man has his head bent down whilst holding on the chair infront)big speech bubble
"OH SHIT!"
Overheard by Phil, AER LINGUS PLANE
Posted on Friday, 06th July 2007
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Rating score (267) | Comments (4) | Email to a friend |
Silly Sausage
Was in the queue at a hot food counter recently and the guy in front of me was asking the girl behind the counter for a sausage roll. The girl asked if he'd like a large sausage-roll or a small sausage roll. "No, a SAUSAGE ROLL" says the guy. "Ok, a large one then is it?" the girl asks pointing to the sausage rolls on display. To which she gets screamed back at her - "Are ye f**kin' steupit, a ROLL wit some SAUSAGES in it...."
Overheard by Noxy, Shop in Dublin
Posted on Monday, 16th May 2005
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Rating score (92) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Hey Ray!
A couple of years ago, I was at a leinster match with 2 friends. after the match we went up to meet the players at the tunnel. we see Gordon D'Arcy so we try to get his attention. my mate jay starts shouting "Hey Ray, Ray!" i go to him, "Who are you shouting at?" Dead serious, he goes, "Ray D'Arcy!" Brilliant
Overheard by Niall, Lansdowne Road
Posted on Thursday, 22nd March 2007
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Rating score (418) | Comments (8) | Email to a friend |
Unfortunate Segue
Heard on Newstalk this morning:
"Later we'll be talking about domestic abuse. A sad side of domestic abuse that no one seems to talk about is when children abuse their elderly parents."
"On an unrelated topic, the makers of Father Ted have a new book out called 'Poor Aul Fellas'"
Overheard by K, Newstalk
Posted on Tuesday, 16th October 2007
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Rating score (112) | Comments (10) | Email to a friend |
How to fail an eyesight exam in spectacular style
My sister recently had to go for a medical for work. During the eye test she was asked to look into this machine and call out the last line on the screen, so she started calling out "a....g....h....pass....pass...r". Then the doctor asked her to call out the next line up from that one - she called out " d.. t...e...f...n..." slightly happier with herself for her ability to read this line. Knowing she had struggled on one or two on the last line she knew the doctor wouldn't exactly praise her sight but nothing could have prepared her for the Doctors comments. "Madam, I'm afraid we will have to investigate your eye sight in more detail - there were no letters on that screen - they were all numbers"...
Overheard by Anonymous, from my sister
Posted on Thursday, 28th February 2008
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Rating score (264) | Comments (5) | Email to a friend |
Bitten by Midgets
(Overheard, after a very long night out, as I'm lying on a top bunk in the 14 person mixed dorm at Abraham Hostel on Gardiner Street)
American: "So, where have you all been traveling?"
Canadian: "You know, around - the 'Dam, Edinburgh..."
American: "I just got from Scotland myself."
Canadian: "Like it?"
American: "Yep, went hiking in the highlands and it was totally awesome, you know, except for getting bitten by the midges. Tenacious bastards."
Canadian: "Yeah man, I hear you."
(American leaves the room to go and fetch his free hostel breakfast)
Canadian: (turns to his other Canadian buddy sitting on the lower bunk) "Dude, did that guy just say that he got bitten by midgets?!?!"
Overheard by Ally, Abraham Hostel, Gardiner Street
Posted on Wednesday, 21st December 2005
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Rating score (268) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Extra time at the Ireland V Chile game
Chile were winning 1-0, and it was coming towards the end of the game. The annoucement came over the loudspeaker that there would be something ridiculous like 6 minutes of extra time (an unusual amount for a friendly game).
Anyhow as it was announced there were two typical Dubs were passing:
"Jaysus Thommo, 6 minutes? He must be adding that much time for when we went for burgers"
Overheard by john, Lansdowne Road
Posted on Wednesday, 28th June 2006
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Rating score (144) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Lettuce-land
Myself and another Dub live over here in Japan. A lot of our friends are keen to learn our humour. So much so, they sometimes repeat what they hear, or what they think they hear without knowing the meaning of it, or even when it is appropriate to use it!!
Picture a big night out, we were joking with another girl, and how was she going to feel the next day considering she had drunk a fair bit!
She replies "I am going to be bad, i'll be in bits! I'll be broken like a bag of lettuce!"
She might have meant lego!!
Overheard by Emma, At a BBQ overlooking lake Biwa
Posted on Wednesday, 16th November 2005
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Rating score (183) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Nice friend
A street party in the city centre, an 84 year old lady, dinking bulmers giving out about her 86 year old friend and neighbour " Sure that aul' wan would drink whiskey off a septic foot"
Overheard by Anonymous, city centre
Posted on Monday, 21st May 2007
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Rating score (142) | Comments (3) | Email to a friend |
A Dub in London
A Dub in London.
London Zoo, my friends sister passes by an enclosure under construction. A porter cabin behind a fence had Mifflin & Co. printed on a yellow sticker near the roof of the cabin. She calls over her 2 kids, "Tom & Liam, come and see the mifflins".
Overheard by David, London Zoo
Posted on Thursday, 14th September 2006
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Rating score (345) | Comments (4) | Email to a friend |
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