Family Fortune
On the Dublin to Sligo train, and two guys get on. Their both culchies. They start chatting rather loudly. The people in the carriage were all listening to them. Suddenly one of them goes "their a big family, their all related"
Everyone just laughed to themselves
Overheard by James, Outside Maynooth
Posted on Wednesday, 01st March 2006
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Rating score (304) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Kennedy's Brain
Listening to 'What's in Kennedy's Head', the prestigious gameshow on FM104, whereby listeners have to guess what Adrian Kennedy (host of the above gameshow) is thinking of – i.e, what is in his head – by asking him clues.
Cue the nice lady with the accent straight outta Moore St. who's clue was: 'is it something in your head?' And who then proceeded to guess: 'is it your brain?' It wasn't.
Overheard by David, FM104
Posted on Wednesday, 01st March 2006
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Rating score (416) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Get out more!
Reading all the stories posted about D4 heads ordering drinks in their unique style reminded me of when I used to work in a pub in Lucan (where everybody thinks they're a D4 head) and here was the order I got one night.
"Pint of the black stuff, (fair enough) pint of heino, (right so) a shirley bassey, (we'll get to that in a minute) and a bottle of apples. (Figured it out?)"
Here is a legend of what they all translate to:
Pint of the black stuff - Guinness (obviously)
Pint of Heino - Heineken (obviously)
Shirley Bassey - Black Bush
Bottle of apples - Bulmers
When we say that these people need to get out more, it doesn't mean go out and upset the bar staff of their local!!
Overheard by Matt, In work, pub in Lucan
Posted on Thursday, 02nd March 2006
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Rating score (359) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Deliver us from D4
While working in a city centre restaurant, two D4 birds waiting at the bar for the rest of their party, while at the table next to them I heard them talking about the late Pope John Paul ii.
D4 #1 "It's awfully sad that he was so ill when he died, I wouldn't say it was a peaceful death."
D4 #2 "And because he's the pope, he never got a day off to get better."
D4 #1 "Yeah, like imagine working in the same job until the day you die." (Pause) "I don't reckon he got a pension either."
Silence. (From all that heard that one!)
Overheard by Matt, In Work, city centre restaurant
Posted on Thursday, 02nd March 2006
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Rating score (381) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
A Crumblin Poet
Sitting outside Redz on thursday night. A young one and this fella we're having a chat.
Girl: "Where ye from?"
Fella: "Crumblin, Where ye from?"
Girl: "Ballyfermot."
Fella replys.. "Ballyfermot people pick your pockets!!!!"
Turns to walk away shouting: "Watch yer pockets boys Ballyer Birds in the House!!!!"
Leaving a very shocked girl on the corner of O'Connell street.
Overheard by mary, Redz O\'Connell Bridge
Posted on Thursday, 02nd March 2006
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Rating score (267) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Limerick Ladette
Leaving work last Friday, a fellow employee turns around to me and she says, "Have a great weekend and I hope you get a blowjob tonight"
I was astonished
Overheard by Vertigo, In the office, Fitzwilliam Street
Posted on Thursday, 02nd March 2006
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Rating score (377) | Comments (1) | Email to a friend |
A Vagina Monologue
The 123 bus was stopped in rush-hour traffic on Tuesday evening. Silence on the bus.
Through the window, one young fella spotted a poster for 'The Vagina Monologues' on a hoarding, and nudged his pal.
"Lookeh. Heh heh! Geeeee!"
Overheard by Anonymous, The 123 bus, Summerhill
Posted on Thursday, 02nd March 2006
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Rating score (382) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Hong Kong Elvis
A girl in work said she has an Elvis cd that you can only buy in Hong Kong and one of her fellow employees replied, "whats it called, wok and roll?"
Genius
Overheard by Anonymous, Georges Quay
Posted on Friday, 03rd March 2006
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Rating score (426) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Storm in a D cup
Overheard, not in Dublin, but from Dubs on tour!
Three girls (yes, three!!) in toilet cubicle next door to me last weekend.
Girl 1 was giving her 2 pals the full unedited version of a row between a fella and his girlfriend earlier in the evening.
Girl 2 (or 3, who knows?): "I don't believe ya! Are ya f***ing serious?"
Girl 1 : "I swear on me life and me tit size!"
!!!!!!!!
Overheard by Anonymous, Toilets in Brandon Hotel, Tralee
Posted on Friday, 03rd March 2006
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Rating score (313) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Smelly Bum
On the bus a while ago.
A rather large woman, with a bit of a B.O problem gets on.
Cue little boy, sniffing: "Wot's dat smell?? Wot's dat smell?!"
His mam tries to get him to shut up. No luck.
He continues: "I tink its her (pointing to the large woman)."
"Yeah, its her. She's got a smelly bum!"
Needless to say, that's when the mam chose to get off the bus.
Overheard by cc, Bus
Posted on Friday, 03rd March 2006
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Rating score (377) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Tastisng the river
"...but you can taste the river, ye know..."
Two lads sweeping paths on Parnell Street, one nodding knowingly.
Overheard by Anonymous, Parnell Street
Posted on Friday, 03rd March 2006
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Rating score (338) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Satellite launch
Overheardon 2FM 'ten to one'
DJ: "Question number 10.
What was the name of the first satellite to beam images from the usa to europe??"
The caller was driving the bus at the time and had absolutely no clue of the answer.
The DJ says: "anyone on the bus look like they know the answer"
To which the driver relies: "don't know about that but I got one here that looks like she was at the launch!"
Genious!!!!
Overheard by timmy, 2FM Radio
Posted on Friday, 03rd March 2006
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Rating score (452) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Special Delivery
Was following a truck on a fairly narrow country road when we pass a sign stating "Low Bridge Ahead", before the truck driver knew it the bridge was right in front of him and not having time to break, he got stuck under it. About 20 minutes later, the guards arrive and one of them says "got stuck eh lad?"
Quick as a flash the driver replies, "No, I was delivering this bridge when I ran out of diesel"
ABSOLUTE CLASSIC
Overheard by Gilly, Kilkenny
Posted on Saturday, 04th March 2006
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Rating score (333) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
